“Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t – you’re right”
Oh, how Henry Ford was right. Our attitude is everything!
And self-confidence is an extremely powerful thing. With the right attitude you will build a self-confidence that will be your prince in a shiny armor (or princess for that sake). Who doesn’t want a shiny armor? I know I will, for sure!
So why is it so difficult (and sometimes impossible) to get the right mindset? Let’s get to it!
Think of a little child. A smiling 4-year-old girl with eyes that lightens up when she’s telling you about how she wants that little pony for her Birthday. How that little pony can live in the garage. It’s no big deal, she can feed the pony before she goes to the kindergarten. And if her father needs to have his car in the garage, the pony can sleep in her room. It’s easy peasy!
For her, it’s possible. For a grown up, it’s not (there’s no rule without an exception, though; my friend had her horse in the garage… So, for some people it’s possible!)
That little girl had the right attitude when it came to what was possible for her or not. She thought she could have that pony in the garage. As this little girl gets older, she will also change her attitude, her mindset.
When her parents tell her the story of how she desperately wanted a pony in the garage, she will laugh, thinking back to those days when her biggest dream was getting her very own little pony (…in the garage). You see… as we experience life, as we learn new things, as we live in a community, we build an attitude and mindset that is expected of us. We don’t want to be different.
Let’s turn the table and look at it this way: If every neighbor had a horse in their garage, it would be strange NOT to have a horse in your garage, right? You would have a completely different attitude when it came to garages vs horses if that was what was expected of you (and your garage…).
That is how our minds work! What we see is what we believe. If we see that all our neighbors have a horse in their garage, then that’s the most normal thing in the world, and then we can have a horse in our garage as well. That is one way to change your attitude. By following the flow…
Train your mind
Another way to change your attitude is by training your mind. (Remember what they say: It’s 90% mindset and just 10% skills!)
When we know that it’s 90% mindset and 10% skills that will get us from where we are today to where we want to go in our life and in our career, it should be “easy peasy” to build a mindset that is assertive and positive, right?
But it’s not… Sorry, but I have to tell you right away: The human brain doesn’t work that way. But we can train it to! It’s not so difficult!
When we train our mind, we will build a mindset that helps us think thoughts like “I can” instead of “I can’t”. You know, the Henry Ford way of thinking.
You might ask: “How do I train my mind so I finally can change my attitude?”.
Well, you can do so by using two words consisting of only three single letters. The words “I AM”. These two words have been called the most powerful words in the Universe, and I couldn’t agree more.
Let me give you an example…
Let’s say that you have a colleague that is a pain in the part of your body that is placed right beneath your back… And let’s call this colleague by the name of John.
If you are constantly telling yourself (and those around you) phrases like:
- I am so sick and tired of John!
- I am so irritated that John always get the best jobs!
- I am so happy that John is away for a few days!
then your attitude towards John will be negative. Very negative. And believe me: your colleagues will see and feel how you behave when John is around. What do you think that says about you as a person and colleague?
You might have a very good reason for having those feelings when it comes to John. But really… Your attitude towards him does not serve you, John OR the work environment.
But you know what? You can change your attitude by the use of the two most powerful words.
Let’s take a look at how those words can help you make a new attitude when it comes to this colleague of yours:
- I am happy that I have colleagues like John that is totally different from me. It just helps me appreciate the rest of my colleagues even more!
- I am glad that someone at the office get good jobs. I am going to do my best to get those jobs myself!
In the beginning, it might seem a bit artificial, but things will change… Give it a try, it’s worth it! And who knows? Maybe John will change based on your new attitude towards him!
Here’s another example of the words “I Am”:
Let’s say it’s 5:30 am. Your alarm goes off. You might think this:
“Aaaargh! I am so tired! I need more sleep! Let me snooze 10 minutes!” What you could think instead is this: “It’s 5:30. My alarm worked today as well. I am ready to start a new day.” You see the difference?
I know it seems kind of phony, but give it a try!
Before we go to the next way to change your attitude, I want you to take a look at these two phrases as well:
- I am so stressed out right now
- I am ready to do a change, because of the stress that has affected me lately
Which of these two phrases felt most exhausting? And which gave you most hope of a new beginning? I think you will say that number 1 felt most exhausting. Even if those two phrases say exactly the same thing, it’s how you say it. It’s how you put it that makes all the difference!
Start today, right here, right now: Say something positive after the words “I Am”, and you will feel the difference. You will!
If you only have this in mind
Always keep in mind that you cannot change your past. None of us can. You cannot change how other people act either. It’s all up to them.
Unfortunately, you cannot change the unavoidable, even if you try your very best. Even if so many people out there have been begging, crying and praying that it was possible to change the unavoidable, none of us can. Unfortunately.
What you can change, is your attitude. Changing your attitude is all up to you. No one in this world can change your attitude, but you. No one. Ever.
When you use as little as three minutes every single morning thinking of how you can do your very best that day, you have come far. You have.
You will come up with good ideas, you will become more positive and resolute.
By doing so, you start changing your mindset. For the better. And remember what we talked about in the beginning of this article:
It’s 90% mindset, my friend!
You can read more about planning and having the right mindset in one of my blog posts right here!