We live in a “quick-fix” society. There are 168 hours in a week. Within this time we repeat certain actions that annoy us, either sometimes or often.
For the past few years I am relearning how to connect to self and others. The truth is — before connecting to self, I needed to disconnect gradually, otherwise it could bring depression, low energy, decreased self esteem behavior.
The following insights turned into actions may change and give a new boost in your life. It gave given me new pathways.
The learning process is continuous, therefore few habits may entirely change your life as it happened to me, when they are re-organized and gradually dissolved. Firstly let’s look at them before flipping over to the bright side.
- The mind rules. It comes often when the head is full of “stuff”, analysis and thinking the way we are. This stuff of over thinking again and again, stuck our potential and drifts in our comfort zone. “If I have something, then I do, then I become happy”– the most common rule and the conditions go on to appear and twitch. Vishen Lakhiani called them “brules”.
- Complaining is about putting attention on the others, on the outside. It is a state of thinking about situations and people, being responsible for our being, for our live, for our achievement. Complaining may transform into self talk on being miserable, ugly, unimportant and “not enough”.
- Multitasking in our life is the “quick fix” skill. There is no time to make pause, because the fix state comes from “I can” approach. It causes the drain of energy, lack of clarity and living under checks of the plan that is temporary. Multitasking may us feel proud, push to the top achiever’s state, however when we stay at peace with self for one minute, we get scared, because we cannot rule or just enjoy our own life.
- Following the stream. To be a White sheep is not easy. To follow and belong to the stream (people, opinions, status) is much easier than lead your live. Competition appears so natural, because we seek to prove others the abilities we have is the core thing. That covers our vulnerability. Consumption is the trigger to be liked by others. The opinions are more important than actual self image.
Therefore 95% of our habits are helpful or harmful. Habits become our natural actions when over the period of time, we receive signal (like stress, loneliness, other people success) and immediately we put a deed and receive a reward.
Mastery and the state of Flow intersect at the point of living in the moment.
So an immediate challenge for you is to break through your new habit of limitless thinking today. The mind is like a muscle, if it is weak it can be conditioned for strength.
If you take a moment and turn your habits into flow, this is what is going to happen.
- Rule of mind crafts the balance with the focus to the heart
Stay on purpose, not on outcome. In other words, do the task because it is what you love to do or because it will help someone or is a valuable exercise. Our minds work through pictures and when we change the pictures to show what we really want in our lives and what we really can achieve; our self-image will also improve dramatically.
Craft the balance between the mind and heart, because when the heart is empowered, awakened we may lead thriving live. Heart flourishes with experiencing, creating, hearing, telling beautiful things to self and others. At that point the head becomes empty.
- Complaining directs into gratitude
Somebody has scribed “happiness level determines your gratitude frequency”. Complaining is about setting the direction to negative, gratitude is the decoding the appreciation. With gratitude we raise self expression and authentic being. Moreover scientifically proven — people who express gratitude are 25 percent happier, more optimistic and better sleepers, when a person is happy his productivity raises by 12 percent as improves decision making, and problem solving, therefore it brings profits if that can be named that way.
- Multitasking transforms into focus.
Your mind has the capacity to hold only one thought in its focus at any one time. The time is getting behind doing multiple tasks have been a real virtue and mastery. More and more the mastership lies in the power of now and focus. Doing one thing at a time is probably the most basic habit of concentration, and one of the most powerful. Focusing on one thing raises productivity, as multitasking trains to be less attentive.
- Following the stream changes to listening to your inner voice of authenticity.
Most people’s life is about getting something. And the truth is, there’s nothing to get. All we have to do is to Be. The Being produces the end result. When you focus your attention on solving problems and trying to make things better, something very interesting happens: you miss what you already have.
So the only way to find happiness and satisfaction is to enjoy what you have right now. Authenticity is when you make a pause and discovers yourself, appreciate what you have already and express it by out loud saying “thank you”.
Anthony Robbins nicely puts it: there is no growth without discontent. So, it is important to live in the present moment. Study your dissatisfaction very carefully because it will tell you something about yourself. Observe yourself how often and what do you complain about; what things do you multitask, how people opinions shape your actions. And by the end ask so called cleaning question: why do I do what I do? Be ready to flow when you start to disconnect.
Last but not the least, the truth is that many programs on self help are available to fix, build a person’s habits, attitude, mindset, however the simple one exercise that heals, empowers and sets new quality in life and professional growth — start with gratitude and walk the talk with it.