Why listen to other people?
 
What advice do you think they will give you?
 
They will give you the “benefit of their experience”; what worked (or didn’t work) for them. Or what they’ve heard worked for people they know.
 
They will load you with their bias and their baggage.
 
It always amazes me that we ask “What would you do?” when we find ourselves in a predicament or have a decision to make about some aspect on our life. “I’ve been offered this job. What do you think?” is a question I am often asked.
 

If you are going to ask for someone else’s opinion do your homework prior to popping the question. 

Think about the issue facing you and think about the potential solutions that you can conjure up.

Evaluate what makes sense and what doesn’t; what’s in bounds and what’s not.

THEN at least you will have a context when you ask the question of someone else and hear their views; a perspective on their answer.
 
NEVER ask the question without knowing the range of possibilities that might work in your unique circumstances. To do so presumes you are prepared to be influenced by their answer without thinking it through yourself.
 
If you expect others to bail you out of your dilemma and provide you with a silver bullet, think again.
 
They won’t. 
 
They can’t.
 
YOU need to take control of your shit.
 
Decide your life context; define the boundaries within which decisions make sense. 
 
Make the call and get on with it. Socializing your dilemma with others is a great excuse for not doing anything – this does you NO GOOD at all.
 
And be prepared to adjust your decision on the run when things don’t unfold the way you expected them to (and they won’t). 
 
Your own imperfect decision  (they all are) modified in response to unexpected and unpredicted challenges along the way is far better than one based on the views of others.
 
Following the advice of another person is a copycat tactic.
 
It’s  personal benchmarking.
 
It rarely works.
Written By
Roy Osing is a former President and CMO with over 33 years of leadership experience covering all the major business functions including business strategy, marketing, sales, customer service and people development. He is a blogger, content marketer, educator, coach, adviser and the author of the book series Be Different or Be Dead.You can also read more of Roy Osing's articles at his website.